Canoe Expedition

It is human nature to make the same mistakes over again. Of course you hear a small voice in your mind warning you against, but somehow, you go ahead anyway. Hope springs eternal that this time, it will turn out better than the last.

We had a visit from two of Bill’s roommates from his VMI (Virginia Military Institute) days – John and another John, who is usually called JJ. A couple of words about VMI. According to VMI men (and I note for the record, that they are not necessarily objective) it is the most prestigious military school in America. Graduates come away with their brain capacity doubled and a muscular physique that makes the veins on their chest look like a road map. The men are proud of their school and the education they received, often marking it on their business cards and etc. 

The morning after their arrival, and after sending the kids off to school for the day, we planned a short canoe expedition on the nearby Upper Delaware River. JJ brought his own canoe. Technically the canoe is built for 3 adults, but the men all agreed that I could only count as ½, so close enough – onwards! This is the same stretch of this river, where some years ago I was in real fear for my children’s and my own safety.

Before

The scene was set for a sunny and social adventure surrounded by beautiful nature. The men loaded the canoe with a giant two-doored cooler filled with beer. All the ingredients for casual enjoyment were present. I found a cozy spot between the cooler and one of the seats. The weather was spectacular, spirits were high, the scenery was stunning – and away we went!

Some parts of the river were very calm, in others there were modest rapids which required some piloting skill to avoid winding up on the rocks or worse possibly overturning the canoe. After each successful passing of a treacherous stretch the men rewarded themselves with a cold beer. 

Before reaching the most challenging rapids of the day, we pulled over on the bank for a lunch break and the men took a little swim. Personally I found the water a bit too chilly. I noticed at one point that John was standing in the water up to his waist and hesitating to go any further. I had the urge to shout out to him, “Hey John, the water around you is turning pink!”. I was afraid that my cheeky Estonian humor might not be fully appreciated. Perhaps even seeming like something from another planet. So I kept my mouth shut.

After our lunch and swimming break it was time to plan a strategy to get through the white water. We decided to go straight down the center. I cannot say, if going more to the right or the left would have made any difference to what came next… The front of the canoe steered right between two large stones, and in an instant the canoe filled with water and we were all thrown out. The scene can be best described as organized chaos. Our first priority was to save the things being carried away in the current. Everyone grabbed for whatever was nearby, at the same time fighting the swift current and the stones. I grabbed on to the giant cooler box and hung on for dear life.

John, who in the critical moment had not lost his sense of humor, called out to me in a very calm and casual tone “Kati, would you pass me a beer please?”. I was the only one who was wearing my life preserver and gave up struggling against the current rather quickly. Resistance was practically impossible. I just let the current carry me. After a couple of hundred bruising meters being at the mercy of nature, I finally reached calmer waters, still hanging on to the cooler. Only then was I able to cast a glance over my shoulder to notice what was happening with the others. John had managed to find a stable footing and was standing in the fast water holding the canoe by one end. He was by far the farthest away.

A bit closer appeared JJ, who presumably also gave up fighting the current and was holding a couple of seat cushions. Closest was Bill, who in my opinion was very selective about the things he saved – he was floating on his backpack, holding the two oars as well as the remaining 3 life preservers. At this point I decided to haul the cooler up onto a large stone on the bank. It was only then that I realized what I had done. Damn! All I saved was the men’s beer!!! At the same moment I noticed a loose seat cushion floating in the distance, and as the water felt suddenly very comfortable and refreshing, I swam after it. Along the way I found my lost flip flops floating in the current, which I had totally forgotten about. Finally I came ashore considerably further down the river than all the others and waited there for the men to catch up. Unfortunately because I was farther away I did not get to see the men’s initial “I am so over it” cool attitude when they emerged from the water.

After

Once everyone had counted their bruises and soothed their pain with beer, Bill suggested that maybe one day soon we should bring the kids down the river on tubes. I thought it would actually be pretty cool. At the same time I heard a familiar little voice in my head, but I did not pay much attention. I guess it was nothing important.